"it has been spoken of"

i am grateful for friends and i forget how much they care. i get so lost inside my own life - inside my own version of reality and i forget they are watching and caring.

a friend of mine told me yesterday she was upset that lately i had forgotten her (or so it seemed) and it had been spoken of among my friends.

she is amazing - and she cares so much, i am ashamed at knowing she felt this way.
it is so easy to love, it is so easy to assume they know you do.

but i realized something as we sat together and laughed together - there is so much joy in being with the people you love. i bring joy into her life. this is an amazing realization for me.

for years i thought i had no true friends. i felt so isolated and alone. i thought that surely anyone who acts like my friend must be lying because what is there to actually like about me? i have finally started to accept that there are many people who would call me a friend and who care about me. there is so much joy in life and in my life.

they watch and they care even when i forget.