thinking about Camus

life can be magnificent and overwhelming. that is it's whole tragedy. without beauty, love, or danger it would almost be easy to live. ~albert camus

i think that it is so hard to stay in that space. it is easy to be safe.
it is hard to trust in yourself and know that it is about living and experiencing,
to be responsible for what happens in our lives,
to appreciate all of it.

i get attached to what I expect other people to be and this is the root of any pain. i was so attached to that in my marriage and tried to turn him into what I expected him to be. i wonder why. is it my own insecurity? does his way of being define who i am?

can i love someone and not have an expectation for who they are or what their experience should be like?

to be with someone and enjoy the love and hurt and joy of it.

to be open to what others can teach us - to hear what they say, to be a part of their experience without losing myself in it. . . .

in the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer. ~albert camus